Greeting and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley. We are up to 8 (flesh burning degrees and believe me – when that wind cuts through your skin and clothing, it is burning!) We, in the Valley, are hoping that this wind is blowing the raw cold out and soon ushering Spring in! Like with all of the situations occurring on our planet with the increase towards the Great Awakening, we each find ourselves saying “enough is enough!”
As we look around at ongoing events of the “Chinese Spy Balloons,” the “Ohio railroad disaster,” the “Ukraine War,” the many school shootings, and oh-so-many-other crazy things happening . . . I see them all as distractions. We find ourselves saying, “There is nothing I can do about it,” (except maybe fret,) but in spiritual reality – they are markers to remind us each TO GO WITHIN and seek that connection we have to Source.
To continue to be loving, to smile, to laugh, and to spread joy raises the frequency on the planet. We are LIGHTBEARERS, here to do service during these distractions. We do it by beginning our days right where we are and meeting what God puts on our plate.
Keeping our focus on:
loving our neighbor and the
Golden Rule of doing unto others as we would have them do unto us
is the great balance act we are asked to provide during the Awakening for humanity.
Like you, I “leak love” wherever I go. Sometimes outrageous silly things come out of my mouth that even surprises me, which gets laughter ringing amongst my peers. Wherever I go, I automatically compliment others and appreciate their efforts (even when they sometimes fall short of how I would handle things.) This level of patience with humanity is necessary right now because of everything they have on their plate to deal with, as well as their perceptions of being victims or unaware of their spiritual nature.
We, the LIGHTBEARERS, know the truth of each of these people. We KNOW their Divine Essence and if it was Christ, Himself, coming to our door or to our telephone or passing Him on the street . . . each of us knows how we would want to treat Him! In the beginning of my day, I dedicate my consciousness to God to use me throughout the day. I surrender my Will for Thy Will and watch where He takes me or who He presents in front of me.
When you understand, “I am One with God and within that Oneness, Infinite Power stands behind me” and “I am One with God, which constitutes my Oneness with all spiritual beings, ideas, and creations,” you find yourself having everything you need before you even know you need it. You also recognize that everyone you are to meet is a decided factor in your day. You meet someone who can be helpful to you and vice versa. It is a WIN/WIN for both of you.
Recalling my service since I wrote last month’s column, I have been staying in Helena during the past seven weeks helping my daughter-in-law with her recovery from the skiing accident. Each person who tracked me down to talk on my cell phone because they couldn’t reach me on my home telephone each said how extraordinary it was that I would devote so much time in service. My brow would wrinkle in confusion and I would respond, “There is no place I would rather be.”
Daily, I received gratitude from Tiffany and my two granddaughters. To me, what I was providing came naturally from my love for them. Isn’t this, after all, what a soul does for their loved ones? Of course it is and with no questions asked or restrictions. It is a GIVE ALL when needed!
I am well known locally for saying on countless (mostly daily) situations, “Have I told you lately how much I love and appreciate you?” They giggle and respond, “Yes.” If I were to go down in history for any statement to others, I hope it would be this one . . . that my beloved heard it for every kind gesture or helpful situation where they willingly volunteered an act of kindness for me or others I became aware of.
Just before I left for Helena, I was invited out to lunch by a friend of a friend. Roger and I found comfortable common ground in so many interests and subjects. The thing I was most astounded for when we celebrated 30 days of knowing one another, to me . . . it felt more like we should be celebrating our Golden Anniversary of being together. I feel such comfort in his presence like we have been together forever. Perhaps we have? Eternity is a very long time . . .
I had only been in Helena for a week following our first date. We had lost power in Helena during the cold winter night. As power came back on, we realized that her ancient mother board in her furnace had died, as well. “Houston, we have a problem.” We were told that no one could assist until Monday, which was two full days away.
Roger had heard of our plight through a text from me. With no hesitation, he asked me to pack up Tiffany and my two grandkids and head to a motel and he would fund the expense. I was grateful for the offer from this new “friend,” but the thought overwhelmed Tiffany of leaving her home exposed during frigid temperatures, packing, and worrying about pets left behind. With her decision, I declined his thoughtful efforts to be helpful to damsels in distress across the miles. Friends of hers donated space heaters and we were comfortably warm until the furnace could be repaired.
The level of Roger’s generous offer to provide for virtual strangers touched me deeply. I spoke of his kindness to others over the following days and each person remarked, “OMG, he has a heart like yours, Gloria!” And so he does as the days and weeks follow and I witness the sweetness of this character!
A year prior to our first meeting with “skin on,” I had a dream and God told me that Roger was my third priority. Two months before our first date, God told me a medical situation he was dealing with. Two mornings ago, I awoke late after being awake most of the night with high energy to the sound of Roger’s voice leaving a message on my telephone answering machine. As I got out of bed and came to the phone to listen to it, I realized there was no message left. I had clearly heard his voice aloud in the home.
I went to my cell phone and a text, clearly identified as the exact time I had seen on my nightstand clock was imprinted for me to read what I heard aloud. This situation is happening more and more with select friends. I can hear their voices aloud while in another room, come to my phone and no message exists there – but the message has come in another form via texting. Supernatural occurrences are so much fun! When our hearts are connected, we have these fine-tuned gifts automatically present themselves. We don’t “need technology,” LOVE NEVER FAILS.
As a “tender heart bear,” there have been times in the past that I felt like I wasn’t “doing enough for humanity.” Surely there must be something more I could be doing with this extraordinarily high level of energy I had been given so abundantly than fixing a meal and feeding neighbors, strangers, or friends/family? Cleaning my house or working in my yard wasn’t doing anything for the greater good . . . or was it? Being filled with love and humming as I did these mundane tasks was sending out a frequency throughout the Cosmos and hopefully touching others along the way.
So many of my friends are submersing themselves in deep discovery of the lies we have been told and discovering the depth of corruption globally. Once aware, rather than becoming addicted to staying in the “evil knows no bounds,” grab the rope of hope and climb out of that pit of despair and join the living and loving that God surrounds you with. Love is all around us and it rings magically in love as it increases your energy level and transforms the dark thoughts to better days ahead.
Yesterday, I sat through a very long Zoom meeting with the Founder Simon Parkes of www.connectingconsciousness.org and listened to updates about the submitted global Humanitarian Projects that will be funded by the QFS (Quantum Financial System.) I have 12 pages of handwritten notes to type and disburse to my local group members during next month’s gathering.
In the months to come and given permission to do so, I will reveal what is forthcoming for humanity. There will be dancing in the streets. When things look the darkest in the days to come, I would ask you to be unafraid. I am not asking you to bury your head like an ostrich and be in denial, but to be a cup half full and know that our old system has to be torn down in order to be rebuilt. It truly is a glorious time to be alive, to witness the unfoldment of God’s Divine Plan.
I am an easy Spirit to fall in love with, it happens often. My daughter teased me before I went to dinner alone with Roger, “Don’t get married on the first date.” However, I am not an easy person to live with, I’m sure.
I have mentioned the high energy I have. I am driven in life to achieve whatever my Soul came to do. I obey God with the slightest guidance without question. My home and cell phone ring constantly with needs from others locally, nationally, and internationally. I lead an exciting life and I run two corporations and keep my home tidy. I always have three entrees and three desserts on hand to feed passersby if they arrive unexpectedly in my home. I am always open to assist those in need. I term myself “high maintenance,” not because I have my hair/make-up/nails manicured weekly or every other year or ten years. I am high maintenance because of God’s lifestyle that I have chosen to be in a total service incarnation.
Imagine a “normal” man wanting to fit in anywhere in the vicinity of the constant helpfulness I provide and live to do. It is near utterly impossible. . .. until the hand of God sweeps down, placing a loving heart in front of you.
In the beginning of a growing relationship, we are “on guard for red flags of here we go again.” We are weighing every word they say because someone will tell you who they are if we just listen. Building relationships has been discouraging and disappointing in the past when we do it the “human hard way.”
Walking through Staples in Helena last Saturday with my granddaughter and Roger, I was explaining to him that I had spoken with my editor the night before and told her how quickly things were progressing with him and I. He stopped me at the end of an aisle and asked me how quickly they were moving. My attention was immediately drawn to an end aisle cap to a book that had the title “OMG” on it. In utter amazement of things I become aware of, I say those letters often in real life and in text form.
Curiosity got the better of me and I picked up the book from the rack and read the subtitle. It said, “Things to do before I DO.” A book for pre-planning a wedding.
I giggled as I handed the book to Roger to read and responded, “About this quickly . . .”
On our first date, we agreed we neither wanted to marry again. On our second date, he reiterated what we had said on our first date and then followed, “But if you told me you wanted to, I’m IN.” I LOVE HIS SENSE OF HUMOR!
Friends have asked me if Roger has a motive or if he is just sending “his best representative to impress me and all the kind things will fade with the passing of time? He was getting “so many points for his kindnesses” that I finally had to tell him I was exchanging them for “feathers” (in his cap) and he should soon expect to receive a full Native American headdress!
Is he trying to impress me as a man? To some degree, perhaps. He has manners and he is a gentle man. I forewarned him, “I am not trying to impress you as much as I am just showing you who I am. I don’t want him getting in too deep if he can’t swim the deep blue sea! He must like fishing . . . because he caught a BIG ONE this time!
I meditated before I began writing, asking the Holy Spirit what message humanity needed to hear today in the column. My thoughts continually went to Roger. I tried to silence myself and ask again. Surely, my love life wasn’t supposed to be the message today – but they continually wrapped themselves into words I could share today.
I am 69, Roger is 73. We stand almost shoulder-to-shoulder and hip-to-hip and are stopped in public by strangers who ask “how long we have been married?” We respond that we have dated for two months. Others stop us to tell us how cute we are together, with smiles on their faces from ear-to-ear and giggles for our good fortune. He and I shine when we are together!
To be gifted with this man, whether it be for a season, a reason, or a lifetime – I am certainly enjoying the reuniting of our souls at this time in our lives. A man who is patient enough to deal with not only my day-to-day busy routine, but to watch me excitedly await news if I have been handed a “Humanitarian Project” to fulfill a dream of a healing center for humanity to come to me and enjoy the outpouring of God’s love through me. Roger vows to support ME in any way he can in order for me to love others. He has been demonstrating his words with actions steps since we met.
Have you told those people in your life who do small (or large) kind things for you how much you love and appreciate them? If not, I hope you will do so immediately through texts, emails, phone calls, or personally face-to-face. Take NO KINDNESS FOR GRANTED. At this time in the evolution of our humanity, it is one of the most extraordinary gifts you can give them as we regrow our new earth and way of living united with one another.
Have I told YOU lately how much I love and appreciate you just being YOU? If I have failed to do so, I am doing it now. I LOVE AND APPPRECIATE YOU! I APPRECIATE THE DIFFERENCE YOU MAKE EVERY DAY THAT YOU SHINE FOR OTHERS.
Until next month, take care . . . I care . . .
…Now and always,
Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.
Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”
Greetings and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley! I hope you all enjoyed your holidays and looking forward into our New Year 2023! For some, you may wonder what just hit you and can only take things in stride, staying in the moment as best you can. But we do know when coal is compressed, it turns into diamonds. At least if you are Superman! It is difficult sometimes to discover the gem in the pile of poop that life hands you.
I am taking you on a journey with me today and trusting you will see the cup half full, rather than half empty.
A few days before Christmas, I received a text from my ex-daughter-in-law in Helena. She and my son may have divorced, but that didn’t change my view as her still being my daughter. The text read that she had a serious skiing accident and was in the hospital, awaiting surgery. She has two daughters and is an amazing single mommy.
Her “real” parents are both deceased, a sibling brother in another state (unable to help), and a grandmother who is incapacitated to be of service. As I sat in my warm home, surrounded with peaceful pretty Christmas decorations, I began to lose my sense of peace. Like many others, those “last minute details of being Santa,” the wrapping, prep for a holiday meal to hold dear the sentiment of the season for a family – I got lost in desperation of wanting to help Tiffany.
With horrid storms and black ice…plus trying to scale the McDonald Pass to get to her without snow tires, I struggled. (I am one of “those people” who have no right to be on the road in inclement weather. I don’t purchase snow tires ON PURPOSE to keep me inbound and not a risk to others on the road. Age delivered me to this point. In my youth, I was fearless. Now I have some sense! It’s called “Common,” but has been seen less and less since 2020!)
The thought of her coming out of surgery without someone loving her, sitting at her side when she awoke, made me want to just sit and cry. Synchronicities began appearing in so many ways, I would have had to have been a complete fool to not recognize them. You are aware that I got hired by Connecting Consciousness last July as an Event Host and that I hold monthly gatherings for spiritual servants to mankind. I had just had an Event Host Zoom meeting prior to the text from Tiffany.
A new service with members had been created, “Me Being You.” It began in another country and our Creator of the global group hoped it could spread to every country. Beginning here in the United States – and in the state of Montana – the service began.
The premise of this new thoughtful venture of working united for one another blazed a new trail for me. If I can’t “be there” to be helpful to a friend or loved one, we have members (possibly) in that area to do it for us. I called our Montana Coordinator in Great Falls and asked if we had a member in Helena who could be me, to get a Christmas dinner to Tiffany and my two granddaughters. She (Ruth) responded that CC has a member ten miles away and would set things in motion. Bless her heart, Cathy (Event Host for her area) agreed to do so. A trip to Costco with groceries easy enough for my granddaughter to heat and varieties of helpful items were delivered to the doorstep of my loved ones. A knot in my throat and tears in my eyes a month later…I can’t find words to say how much appreciation I felt (and still feel) for Cathy stepping up to the plate (no pun intended.) I wrote her a heartfelt letter of gratitude and offered to send her a check in reimbursement for her gas and expenses and she politely declined.
At the most loving time of the year – I received such a beautiful gift from another CC member! It meant the world to me for someone to “have eyes on” with my family in need when I couldn’t possibly be there for them any other way.
At the same time, I received a telephone call from a sweet homeless friend in Oregon. I told her about this new program we are waking up in Montana and she is already a member of CC. She made a call to the Coordinator in her area and was provided a comfortable, beautiful warm shelter and donations for gas to get to them. What a lovely inspirational concept to do for one another.
I would encourage anyone to go to www.connectingconsciousness.com and sign up as a new member, whether you are the one in need – or the one who would like to join with “like-minded folk” or would be interested in volunteering to be of service for someone in need in your area. There is no fee to become a member, it just takes a willing loving heart to become involved.
Last late summer, two of my local friends had a dear one coming to the Bitterroot Valley to visit. I was invited to join them at dinner. At the threshold of the restaurant, Roger opened his arms to give me a hug and state how happy he was to meet me, he’d heard a great deal about me. We enjoyed our dinner and us two characters connected, talking as if these two ladies weren’t present. At the end of the meal and in saying goodbye, he offered to hug me. As we embraced, now a second time, I recall that it had a feel of such comfort. (Last month’s column was written about the gifts of a hug and their importance.)
I am 4’11” and though I hug everyone…not all of them are comfortable to me to hold “normal size people.” On tippy toes and arching my back – unless I have a foot stool to reach them comfortably, hugs are not always easy for me to reach and enjoy, too. But Roger is 5’4 ¼” and it felt so good to me. In fact, as we parted from the hug…my greed set in and I asked for “seconds.” Politely, he agreed. Off he drove to continue on to his destination in Idaho.
I teasingly stated, “Oh my God! He would be SO FUN to dance with! “Someone just my size. On the walk back to my home, my girlfriend said, “Oh my God – what have we done?! Although, you two are really cute together…….”
On December 30th, I received a text from Roger for the first time. Months had passed .and he had returned to the Root. He had a request, inviting me to go on a walk with him and his dog, Willie. I declined. “Maybe in the spring thaw…but, no.” I countered his request, “Feel free to stop by my home and have coffee to visit.” He responded by asking me out to lunch instead. Along the way, I had him stop to look at a property I am seriously interested in if I am one of 30,000 requests for Humanitarian Projects approved globally through CC. I shared my dream with him for the plans I have to make MOTHER HOPE’S HOUSE a reality to share with humanity coming to the “Most Loving Place on Earth” to be healed, nurtured, and loved more than they have ever experienced in their lives.
On New Year’s Eve, I had plans to spend with my friend Leslie who had just lost her sister Nancy in December. From experience, I know all-too-well how it feels to be celebrating holidays alone. I was looking forward to watching chick flix, eating popcorn and snack-attacks until midnight with Leslie. The weather had cleared and it would only be a two hour drive for me to get to Helena to stay with Tiffany to be of service to her and the girls.
When we “wait upon the Lord,” and do things His way – in present moment, getting inspiration and motivation simultaneously, the doors open, and everything comes together perfectly.
Upon my arrival with a van loaded for bear with food, I was a sight-for-sore eyes for little Miss 11 year old Kallie who had the chore of doing dishes for her momma until I got there. I let her know right up front, “I am taking over the kitchen. I will do all the cooking and dishes.” Pure relief was on her face and verbal gratitude. I did, however, let her and my 14 year old granddaughter Ayriana know that I had brought two cookbooks with me. I wanted them to each go through the books and pick out five recipes that sounded good to them. Easy 5 ingredient recipes were soon going to be learned to take over after I left to continue to be helpful to momma. I would oversee their cooking while still there in order for them to gain confidence to do this when I left.
High stress filled the home. Any little disagreement led to actual hitting, slapping, punching, and kicking between the girls. I wasn’t comfortable with their behavior, but nor am I going to go anywhere to be of service and think I am there to change the way they live. That isn’t “my rock/responsibility to carry.” But as a member of the family, as an elder, I am on this planet to correct without judging or berating.
Following one of their arguments, I asked Kallie, “Would you haul off and punch a friend of yours at school the way you just hit your sister?”
“No,” she replied. I asked her why? She responded that the girl wouldn’t want to be her friend any longer. “Correct,” I answered.
I explained to the girls that one of the projects that I created on the planet was called “The Global 8 Prayer/Peace Movement” to end rape and abuse in this generation.” I also declared, “Now, how much credibility would I have as the creator of this project if I am out telling people to STOP THE HATE/PRAY THE GLOBAL 8 and have my own loved ones continue to be abusive to one another?” The answer is easy enough………
I continued to explain how abuse dominoes in our lives if we don’t correct our behavior. I said, “It WON’T BE LONG and you are both going to start dating. Let’s say you have a boyfriend, he says or does something you don’t appreciate and you haul off and hit, punch, kick, or slap him. He may have been told not to hit girls – but it also happens that sometimes people just REACT and follow the same behavior that was delivered. Do you want to take the chance that some guy is going to knock-you-into-tomorrow, following your lead of disrespect?
“No,” they each responded.
Driving the point home, I had to ask one last question, “Let’s say you get married and still have this behavior towards others. You don’t realize at your age and it feels like a lifetime away before you marry. But just for now – LET’S SEE OURSELVES DOWN THE ROAD AND MARRIED, MAYBE EVEN HAVING CHILDREN. Would you want to be in a relationship of domestic violence, frightened for yourself or your kids being hurt by these behaviors?”
“No,” they each quickly replied.
Sigh. “Then, I think we all agree to begin immediately to change how we react to feelings of frustration and anger because if you two continue to have energy to fight, a bathroom needs cleaned, snow to be shoveled, cat box to clean, a kitchen floor to be mopped, and laundry to fold and put away. We will begin today to keep this home loving and peaceful to help momma heal faster,” I finalized. Benish Law.
We only had one OOPS following the new guidelines. Being a person of my word, each girl had to do an immediate chore before they could go to bed.
Such loving behavior began. I made chocolate chip cookies one afternoon to have the house smelling homey when they walked in after school. I had saved a small portion of the cookie dough for Kallie as a surprise, hearing how much she loved it. When I told her, she said, “I think I’ll put it in the fridge for Ayriana to enjoy.” My heart was touched……
Daily, I received pure appreciation from all three of them. The girls thanked me kindly for cooking. I was appreciated for driving them to school activities and appointments. Tiffany was thoroughly touched that I would come and be of such service, saying, “I couldn’t have done this without you, Gloria.” My response was, “There is nowhere I would rather be, there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”
Upon my arrival, I had mentioned to Tiffany that we as a humanity need to pay attention to the actions of others, rather than words. Anyone can say, “I love you” or “I’ll be there for you,” and when the going gets rough…they are nowhere to be found. Sometimes it takes more energy to keep someone in your life than to just let them go. I choose to walk my talk.
While in Helena, it was just geography. I just do what I do no matter where I am. I am just me. Before I began today’s column, I was thinking, “I don’t know if I have anything even important for a reader to hear.” I quieted myself and asked the Holy Spirit to open my inner listening ear to receive the Word and Will of God to be put to print because I live by every Word that proceeds out of His mouth. Humanly, I don’t know diddly, but there is a Divine Mind within me and I acknowledge it and follow the inner lead. It tends to impress me constantly!
While in Helena, I received a text from Roger asking permission if he could drive to Helena to take me to lunch and give me a break from being Tiffany’s “beck n call Granny B?” I asked Tiffany if I could be excused for a couple hours if I prepared everything she might need in my absence, and of course, she encouraged me to go and enjoy myself. Roger drove three hours, one direction, to spend quality time together. He and I can talk for hours, it seems, and still desiring more. He asked two days later if he could return to Helena for another lunch date, once again driving three hours one direction to do so. Yes…was the answer.
Only days into my arrival in Helena, the power went out during the night. It fried the Mother Board of Tiffany’s ancient furnace. When Roger heard of our plight, he texted me to find a motel of our choosing, rent two rooms, and have the desk clerk call him to pick up the tab. What a sweet offer, but Tiffany was in no shape to be moved out of the home. The thought of doing so was overwhelming with pets, a house that could freeze, and the effort of getting her and two girls packed to leave the dwelling. I thanked him kindly and said, “We are women – hear us roar!” He countered with, “You can roar tomorrow, I can’t bear thinking that you all will be cold.”
With the generosity of friends, they delivered five space heaters and we were all toasty warm. Following the weekend, a serviceman came out and installed a used Mother Board, affordable for Tiffany, and a most blessed conclusion.
Before I left Tiffany’s home, she expressed such sadness in all this happening. She is with the National Guards and was expecting to be deployed out of the country for a year. I had agreed to keep my blood-born granddaughter, Ayriana and Kallie’s “real” grandparents would keep her in Helena. With this “glitch in the Matrix,” now with recovery, Tiffany was disappointed that she night not have this experience of deployment which would then provide retirement benefits through the Guards.
I explained to her that we are living in a whacky world of corruption, lies, and deceit on every level being brought to disclosure as it comes to light. “IF” her soul needed to experience a broken leg, denying the ability to be deployed, it would be for her highest good. As far as worrying about not getting “retirement,” she needed to become aware that God has a better Plan in store for her than she could have ever conceived. Good or bad, who’s to say?
I am home for only five days here in the Root to pay bills, write this column, have my CC gathering and return on Monday to Helena. Her MRI results came back yesterday and it disclosed that she has a herniated disk and surgery on her back is being planned (with an 8 week recovery time.) Until further notice, my residence will be in Helena until I can witness weight bearing/driving again/recovery from back surgery. As I said, there is nowhere I would rather be to be of service.
I received word that the last block to the Quantum Financial System just got removed, which opens the way for the Humanitarian Projects. I am hoping to hear any time now that I am one of them who has been chosen. I would love nothing more than to expand and give YOU the opportunity to come to MOTHER HOPE’S HOUSE and feel loved more than you have ever felt in your life. I want to teach you HOW TO GO WITHIN and allow life to happen for you, not “TO YOU.”
In my usual wordiness way, I have to end today’s column with explanation of something I heard Directly from God a year ago. “Roger is your third priority.” You know how it is in the Bible? There can be a statement – and then a seeming contradiction? God uses the EXACT word that can be experienced from a spiritual standpoint – AND – from a material/earthly standpoint.
When I heard Him say these words, I was waiting for a “green light” whether I should marry a local man named Roger. When I heard he was my “third priority,” I took it to mean that I had to place God first, “whatever would be the second priority/a spiritual center?” and the man, himself, would be third on my list of things to do.
In Helena, my perspective shifted. I have been a widow for 17 years, never coming close to marrying again. The previous proposal turned out to not be a consideration. Who would have thought (except God) that he would send another guy by the same name? If he is to be my “third priority,” I take it to mean as a mate whom I would place him first in all that I do. It could very well be a possibility with this kind, caring, loving thoughtful, supportive man. Only time and actions (not words) will tell….
I did, however, arrive home and my double driveway was cleared of all ice and snow for my upcoming gathering (without asking or even suggesting) and there were two dozen long-stemmed roses here for me.
For someone who didn’t know if I had anything of importance to say today, I hope you are inspired somewhere in all those words! I give thanks that I am given this opportunity to share my love with you across the miles.
Until next month, take care . . . I care . . .
Sincerely and respectfully submitted,
Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.
Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”
Greetings and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley! A fire is burning gently in my wood stove keeping me toasty warm against the outside elements of nearing 16 degrees below zero. The wind is howling outside and my large wind chimes are either delighting or frustrating my neighbors.
Like you, I have been busy building to the crescendo of the holiday season. A mountain of Chex Mix placed in beautiful Christmas tin containers has been delivered to each of my neighbors this year. I offered an apology that I decided not to put them all into a “sugar coma” with the overly-sized plate of all the Christmas cookies and fudge I normally make. I told them that I would hold out for “unsuspecting strangers” to receive that amazing treat this year! I got all the Rum Cakes delivered to the local businesses to thank them for their service all year and to show my appreciation and love. Numerous cookie trays have found their way to many first-timers, all delighted to receive the food made with loving hands and heart.
As I was driving to (my best friend) Nancy Whitman’s Memorial Service on the 9th of December, I was rehearsing what I might say that evening in regards to my feelings of having her in my life. I began to weep. Driving with tears is dangerous, so I removed my glasses and wiped them and swallowed the lump in my throat. Down the road, I gave my thoughts a second chance to prepare for what I might say publicly and I had to regain my balance a second time. I was torn inside. If I couldn’t prepare my thoughts in private, what made me think I could say these things in public without crying?
I arrived an hour early to help her sister get things set up before people started arriving. Several people had volunteered to help. As I was bringing my last load of food in and plugging in a crock pot of casserole, we all heard a shish/bang/BOOM as a table was dropped on the floor. I turned to look and one of the volunteers had slipped and fallen flat on his back HARD.
Before I explain this incident, I need to return to waking up that morning. As I was getting back into my body, I became aware of the Violet Light/Healing Christ Consciousness gathering in my inner vision. From the center of my vision and Soul, I watched the light gather, pulse, and begin flowing outwardly – taking up the entire circumference of my sight. I sighed, knowing that “Christ was going before me, preparing my way and day, and knowing that He would perfect and perform what was given for me to do.” Assurance like that allowed me to place my feet on the floor and a smile on my face, wondering what amazing things would be forthcoming.
Kevin had volunteered to bring his guitar and sing three of Nancy’s favorite John Denver songs, but alas, he was splayed out on the floor and hurtin’ for certain! I walked the length of the large room to approach him peacefully and with great calm, rubbing my two hands together for what would be forthcoming. To quote Jennifer Gerelds, “When we approach the people and circumstances of life confident in who God created us specifically to be, we usher breathtaking beauty and perspective into this world.” As I neared his side, I overheard one of the women volunteers excitedly share, “Make room – we have a healer in the crowd!” I playfully responded, “No one should ever leave home without one….”
I overheard Nancy’s sister Leslie ask Kevin if he wanted her to call 911 and he said no. I could hear her “inner inaudible-to-others-dialogue,” …”This is the LAST thing we needed to happen with the stress level I already feel!” Bless her heart – anyone who has lost someone and has to write an obituary and prepare a Memorial Service to give others closure while in this beginning state of grief, knows EXACTLY how Leslie was feeling!
People surrounding Kevin helped him slowly get up off the floor and into a chair. He described his severe pain as a rib, not broken…but displaced. I placed my rubbed hands on top of his head and began my process of giving him “a little extra love.” Honestly, as a healer, I don’t have the right or ability to “withhold love.” But, as a human, I didn’t feel qualified right then. I, too, am in a state of grief. My heart has broken with this loss. But we discover that even shattered people can be used by God before He puts all our “Humpty Dumpty parts and pieces back together, again.”
As a healer, I am NEVER trying to fix/heal people’s human boo-boos. I am an instrument to lift their human consciousness into a spiritual state of consciousness where everything is already perfect and reveals itself outwardly. I am quieting myself, listening to inner dialogue and guidance of where to move my hands to burn off trauma, and watching the light. I am busy FEELING what they feel so I know where to place my hands. As I was proceeding with quietude, Kevin was bossing me to move my hands to where he felt his pain. I explained calmly that I would, but I was a little busy doing what God wanted me to do and following the Infinite Invisible’s instructions.
I know I was frustrating Kevin by not doing what he thought I should be doing, as he was frustrating me by drawing my attention away from “my Boss.”
From shoulder-to-shoulder across the top of his back and up into the right side of his neck was HOTTER THAN A TWO-DOLLAR PISTOL! The heat went down his right arm, below his “Popeye Muscle,” into the inside of his elbow and to the wrist. This imbalance of energy was being rebalanced quickly and the trauma was being “burned off” for preventative problems down the road….
Kevin was insisting that he wouldn’t be able to sing tonight and that he needed a chiropractor. Just as he said those words aloud, the door to assistance through me slammed shut with a mighty thud. “Gloria didn’t do that…his limitation of receiving did.” Patty, a member of my monthly CC gathering had just arrived to say her goodbyes to her beloved Nancy. She approached us and asked what was going on. I explained briefly and Kevin cried out a second time, “I need a chiropractor!”
Remember my “wake-up call” that morning? Christ had gone before me and prepared my way? Patty smiled and said, “I am not a chiropractor, but I am an Osteopath.” She stepped in and within less than five minutes, she took care of that displaced rib and Kevin sang like a canary for the Service! I have been packing around a “Mustard Seed of Faith” for a while now. I offered it to Nancy on her deathbed and she refused, “Save it for someone else.” I offered it to Kevin and he denied it, too. I got to use it this past week, but that story will have to wait for another column to be shared. God doesn’t just give us one Seed…they are infinitely given, as needed!
During the service, the Chaplain walked around with a microphone for guests to share their loving experiences with Nancy. I sat quietly, rehearsing my fears of crying in public. I surprised even myself as I heard my voice speaking without my permission, “I am willing to feel my fear and do it anyway!” With microphone in hand, I began stating how Nancy and I had met two years prior.
Nancy posted a picture of her dog Dosha on Facebook. Her dog’s head was hanging out the back window of her car with a smile on her face! I KNEW I HAD TO MEET THAT DOG! God works in mysterious ways, eh? I wrote to Nancy on Messenger and said something lame, I’m sure, “I know this will sound crazy…but from the core of my being…I KNOW I need to meet that dog!” She responded, “I read your book, “Go Within or Go Without,” and I have ALWAYS wanted to meet YOU!” She lived 16 minutes away from me and we met on my back porch in the summer of 2020 during the beginning of crazy on our planet. It was love at first sight. God used a dog…it was Nancy that I was destined to meet!
Nancy mentioned that afternoon that her sister Leslie had always wanted to meet me, as well, so we set up a second play date and we all immediately became best friends. What Nancy and Leslie felt while around me or in my home, they soon realized they had a role to play in my life, as well. They witnessed me “feeding the masses, helping the homeless, healing the sick and broken hearted, loving the unlovable, being patient with the mentally ill, and financially assisting when possible.” They experienced me pouring love out to everyone who crossed my path and decided to do that for ME!
I was given a key to their home (and heart.) I was given a bedroom and invitation to come any time of night or day if I just needed someone to pour love back into me. We had lots of slumber parties and they listened non-judgmentally as I needed to vent. I received as many hugs and “goodnight/I love you’s” as needed. Imagine these words spoken with longgggg pauses at the Memorial, through tears. The lump in my throat blocked these words and so many more I could have spoken if I could have.
Many guests said later that they couldn’t speak aloud after me because they knew they would have done the same thing….. But I did feel my fear and I pushed through it, doing it anyway! Nancy and her sister Leslie Whitman looked like “two people,” but they were One with God. I know this personally…or they couldn’t have demonstrated His Love for ME without it being true. I expressed gratitude that I could still FEEL NANCY and her love through Leslie’s heart….
I awoke at 1 a.m. last night from a dream about Nancy. I was standing on stage before an audience with a microphone in hand. I was rehearsing what Nancy, Leslie, and their family had given me. As you read above, Nancy didn’t give me a lot of “gifts wrapped with ribbons and bows.” I was given love, hugs, nurturing, a key, a bedroom, a listening ear…gifts that are priceless.
Coming out of the dream state, I laid in the dark and listened to my heart speak. Getting out of bed, I got a cup of coffee and grabbed my cell phone and opened it. Nancy’s nephew Matthew had written a text, foretelling me of a gift he sent, arriving today. I wrote the following words:
I woke up at 1:00 last night, having a dream about being on stage talking about Nancy. Leslie was in the front row and affirming almost every sentence I was using to describe Nancy. I woke up thinking how beautiful and right it would have sounded to have been able to say at her Memorial instead of what I was capable of doing in real time. Many others that night said they wanted to speak, also, but knew they would crash like I did and not willing to do that in front of everyone. Back to the dream…
I explained that I can’t walk past a box of Whitman’s chocolates in a store without getting the warm fuzzies of their generational hugs. It may have started with Nancy letting me experience them and then finding out that her relatives are ALL one in the same with THAT WHITMAN HUG.
OH MY GOD, IF THEY COULD JUST PATENT AND BOTTLE THEIR HUGS! (See…you guys just take it for granted cuz it IS all you have probably ever known…but for outsiders, it is SO LOVING, unique, and memorable!
Nancy, of course, was my first experience. She wrapped those loving momma arms around me, pulled me into her soft comfortable body, and just held me so dearly. She used one hand to open handedly wash my broken back with such tenderness, easing the heartache each time she held me from the assaults I had been through.
For those moments in time in her arms are my favorite memories of Nancy. She didn’t give me physical gifts I hold dear (except for my little kid plate” in their cupboard so my food wouldn’t touch with the meals they served me) …but the important gifts she gave me were those hugs.
Dosha hated sharing her mom’s hugs and we had to put her outside in order to get them. Our departing hug had become a HANDSHAKE with smiles and laughter.
Dosha decided she didn’t want Aunt Leslie to hug me any more either and growled and wanted to eat me…AND I PUT MY FOOT DOWN AND BECAME ALPHA on that one! No more lost time on a Whitman Hug!! Uh uh uh…you don’t get that power any longer, Dosha, cuz time has stolen more than I was willing to give.
The dream was spectacular! I was able to express and FEEL Barbara’s hugs, Peggy’s …you and your family and I am just so grateful that ya’ll left one of you WHITMAN’S BEHIND FOR ME TO HAVE AND TO HOLD…AND TO BE HELD BY.
I imagine this speech was heard by Nancy and her parents in the ethers, to let them know that their “apples didn’t fall far from the tree.”
My goal/bucket list would be to meet Elaine and all the rest of your kin. Inquiring minds just want to know if every single one of you have that same touch?
Have a great day, knowing you are all VERY MUCH LOVED AND APPRECIATED!!! Merry Christmas Whitman family! And happy, Happy, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! Ooxx
For this new, exciting, prosperous New Year 2023 that we are around the corner from, let’s learn from the WHITMAN family HOW TO HUG. Can you imagine Jesus being stiff and stand-offish when He holds out His arms to hug you? NO! He would open His arms wide to receive you. He would place those tender arms around you and pull you close to His chest and pure heart. You would be so close; you couldn’t tell the difference if it was His heart beating…or yours? Or were they actually ONE?!
Hugs weren’t created to be a “hit & run quick exchange,” stiff, or unfeeling. They are a biological need for humans for the touch, the sense that someone cares, and an energy exchange of God on the scene. Relax in one another’s arms, give yourselves enough time to climb right inside each other’s hearts. When you experience this firsthand, you will know exactly what I am describing as a WHITMAN HUG. If you can’t afford to buy someone a gift this year, give a HUG.
During this holiday season, I am praying that you know deep in your heart that God will protect you, comfort you, and give you peace. He will listen to you, strengthen you, and carry you because He loves you so much. Open your eyes and heart to receive Him through the next person He puts in front of you and opens their arms to give you a hug.
In honor of Nancy and Leslie’s relative Jeremiah Whitman, I have chosen the following inspirational message to end today’s column:
Jeremiah 31:3 NIV:
I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.
This simple, but profound sentence identifies the Whitman Hug and family lineage, they are absolutely Love/God in Action.
Until next month, take care . . . I care . . .
…Now and always,
Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.
(Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”)
Greetings and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley! It is Thanksgiving morning. In the background, I have the Thanksgiving Parade on and my granddaughter is watching it for the very first time. As a youth, watching on our old fashion black and white TV, it was exciting. I can remember the smell in the home of mom preparing our meal for later. The fine China was being set on the table and my two older siblings and I were randomly called away from the television to assist mom with chores we were capable of doing. Dad would be called upon to say Grace before we began eating and I believe he was onery on purpose. He would say “GRACE, LET’S EAT!” Mom would give her usual look of disapproval and start passing the food.
Mom had three “built-in dishwashers.” I usually got stuck standing on a chair to reach the counter and washed, Vicki rinsed, and Terry dried and put them away. Feeding the masses took so much prep to cook and clean-up was always on us kids. Terry, the eldest, was put in position for “Quality Control.” If I didn’t get it clean enough – back again into my dish water to start again.
China put back into the cupboard, table and counters washed down, trash emptied, floor swept . . . out came the decks of cards and chips. Everyone regathered around the table and we spent the rest of the day playing “21,” my mom’s favorite card game. Being raised by a compulsive gambler taught us kids early how to count (and oftentimes, how to win!)
The sun went down and out came the leftovers to feed the family and guests a turkey sandwich on homemade dinner rolls, the salads, and another piece of pumpkin or pecan pie. Time to assume your positions again Gloria, back to the stool to reach the dish water because we didn’t use paper plates in those days. Repeat the steps of washing down the kitchen, sweeping, and emptying the trash. It was the least we could do after Dad had brought in the supply to purchase the food and mom had spent her time so lovingly to cook it for all of us. Us kids might have secretly griped about dishpan hands and slaving so young, but it taught us early how to be servants for others in the grander scheme of things.
I married at age 18 and my first holiday meal I was cooking was an eye opener. The eyes opened very wide at the grocery store to see the expense of buying all the food to allow my mother’s tradition to be carried on. Being organized and having some common sense of the order things should be accomplished to “make it all look effortless” had to be given as a gift from God. My guests were pleasantly surprised that I could, indeed, step into my mother’s shoes and pull it off.
Over the last 51 years, I have never failed at a holiday meal, beginning on Thanksgiving – and weeks later doing it again for Christmas – and a few days later, doing it again for New Year’s Eve and New Years Day. These holiday meals were as memorable and delicious as my youthful years. I have often asked why I continue this tradition, why I work so hard with a single meal when it could be done so much easier. Surely, a day of gratitude doesn’t have to take so many hours and days to do and could be enjoyed just as much. But everyone looks forward to the feast and I enjoy putting loving time in for them to eat that food made with loving hands and heart. It continues my family traditions and heritage, to re-experience my parent’s love, and to remind me of the good things in life that brings families close together, to keep us united.
When Covid arrived and all the crazy stuff induced by fear hit – I can’t tell you how many times I heard people say, “I just want things to go back to normal.” “Normal” for some people wasn’t a very heartwarming place to be. Those who had enjoyed the good things in life now found themselves in the moccasins of the less fortunate.
Sixteen years ago, when Kirk died, my four kids had gone on with their lives and I was left alone to try and figure out how to go forward with my life without them – and without Kirk. I had no more “routine” left to rely upon. With two step-daughters states away and my two blood-born children enlisted in the Army and Air Force and unavailable for holidays, I had to improvise. I gathered loners who had nowhere else to go or people to be with. I invited them to my table to provide a grand family gathering and eat delicious recipes made with loving hands.
This year, my daughter Danielle offered to have the holiday meal in her home. Her mother-in-law and myself are helping her to pull it all off, effortlessly and easily. However, last Saturday – a week early while I had my monthly Connecting Consciousness meeting – I heralded a meal of Thanksgiving for nine people at my table. For those who would have nowhere to go or be today. They were stunned that I would go out of my way to do this for them, when in reality, it is just my nature to do so.
That spiritual nature within me is the first thing I want to give thanks for today. Without making that Direct Connection before I ever get out of bed . . . I am sure that my life would look much like those who feel “lost” right now. I acknowledge that Presence and Power within me, I acknowledge the Kingdom of Heaven within me that Jesus taught in “red letter words” in the Bible. I dedicate my consciousness daily to God, denying Self Will for Thy Will, so He can use me to show His Grace in every word I speak and every action I take.
“Gloria” is the one who is thanked and as quickly as possible, I hand the credit for the goodness to God (where the gratitude truly rests.) It isn’t that I have more hours in a day than most people to accomplish so many things . . . it is because I have made a Direct Communication with the Infinite Invisible and allow Him to place people/chores/events in the correct order and the energy to pull it all off.
If you had followed in my footsteps this past month, which began with November 1st and went directly to Thanksgiving Day (or so it seemed because it flew by so quickly,) you would be exhausted in just reading it.
I am going to condense it in description and you will have to read between the lines or this month’s column would be overwhelming to a human mind.
Three weeks ago, a friend texted and asked me to take her sister to Urgent Care or the E.R. She had a meeting she could not miss, and her sister was short of breath. I dressed and headed straight to Missoula. Urgent Care couldn’t help her and E.R. admitted her. Tests were taken. She received a diagnosis for liver cancer, a surgery scheduled in Spokane and everyone could live “happily-ever-after” (because the liver can regrow itself.) The doctor decided instead to do more tests for a colonoscopy to see if perchance it had spread. Results from all tests taken described a rare incurable liver disease that had infected every organ and the diagnosis: “terminal…you have seven days to live.”
We certainly “didn’t see that coming!” Leslie and I got her sister Nancy discharged and by the time we were pulling into their driveway, Hospice was there to meet us. Everything seemed so accelerated and surreal. Daily for three weeks, I have made countless trips to Missoula to be of service. Driving incoming family to and from the airport, sweeping the floor, vacuuming, folding laundry, buying groceries and making food, doing dishes, waiting on Leslie and Nancy hand and foot, bringing light-hearted humor and endless lovelight and peace into the household. If it would have been possible, I would have traded places with Nancy and selflessly given my life to save hers.
Nancy passed away at 2:45 a.m. on November 20th. One of the sweetest hearts I have ever met passed from the visible to the invisible. Starting a fundraiser for Leslie to help with funeral expenses, along with future needs without her “second half of a paycheck” to pay bills – my service has not ended. Leslie’s first Thanksgiving without her best friend/sister will be difficult (I speak from experience) as well as the upcoming holidays and every day, as well, begins a new and challenging time.
In Leslie’s sympathy card, enclosed with the first donations available, I wrote, “I haven’t even allowed myself to cry yet for the loss of Nancy. I fear if I begin…I will never stop” because the loss is so tremendous for me. As a healer, I have a human aspect wondering why He didn’t use me to change the outcome. Miracles happen all the time though me, why couldn’t this woman be the recipient of one of them? Her human personality wanted to stay; her Soul decision said her mission was complete. We humans are left to wonder……… We can’t even wrap the Mind of God around our little pea-brain sized human constructs to understand. All we are left with is to accept, go through our human anger and confusion, experience the steps of grief, and g(r)o(w) on.
In many columns, I write “chop wood/carry wood/don’t be an asshole.” My youthful training taught me to serve. With my spiritual training, it expands in every circumstance. If it is put on my doorstep, my telephone, or in front of me – my awareness of what needs to be done gets done.
It’s Thanksgiving – back to gratitude! I am grateful that I got a “kiss on the forehead from God” to even meet Nancy and have her as one of my local best friends! I am so grateful that we passed through one another’s lives, if even it was for two brief short years together. I am grateful for the memories of her warm loving genuine heart (and hugs! They were the BEST!)
I am grateful for this day that I could wake up in a comfortable bed with cozy covers and jammies. I am grateful I have indoor plumbing, wood for my stove, hot coffee, an abundance of food to share and enjoy. I am grateful to have all but one of my grandchildren today, and my two blood-born children in my presence. (My son normally has to work on holidays, so this is a very special treat for me today!)
I am grateful that the roads aren’t snow-packed and icy today for travelers. I am grateful that on this day, usually where others are overwhelmed to just get a big meal on the table, that I am able to sit at the computer and spend time with YOU.
During this sad time, our friend Patti flew in from Minnesota. With her medical background, she was of great service to Nancy, Leslie, incoming family, and me and no words can express my deep gratitude. Because she was staying in their home, I had peace of mind when I left at night, that they were in capable, loving hands. Patti is the “servant” in her family to purchase and cook the Thanksgiving meal herself (because other family had other obligations) and like me, she has her Direct Connection to fulfill those things that need to be accomplished. But my point being, is she listened selflessly to her heart, purchased an expensive airfare, and flew to be of service to others…. without blinking an eye. Which leads me once again, back to YOU.
I GIVE MY THANKS TO YOU, THE READER! Although we have never met with skin on and may not even pass through one another’s life – I KNOW YOU ARE OUT THERE, DOING THE SAME THING THAT PATTI AND I ARE DOING FOR OTHERS.
This world is a better place because of YOU. You doubt that I know you when I see you in passing? I bet you recognize “one of us” in your day-to-day walk, too!
Two days ago, I stopped at a business that was gifting me with an apple pie to share with my family. I entered the business. A small child ran from across the room and hugged my legs. I had never seen her before in my life. I knelt down to be at her eye level and she threw her arms around me and hugged me so lovingly. More than a little stunned, the business owner said, “Say Happy Thanksgiving to Miss Gloria.” She parroted his words, “Happy Thanksgiving Miss Golria!”
I asked her how old she was and she held up four fingers and said, “Four!” I responded, “I am 69” and in question form, she shouted in amazement and disbelief, “69?!”I expressed my appreciation to Mike and as I walked to the door to leave, this child walked with me. I turned as I left the building and this sweet child’s face was glowing with a smile, waving goodbye and throwing kisses to me.
She saw my light. She may have even sensed my heartache. This child knew a love-heart when she saw one and showed her loving appreciation to me, which entirely brightened my day.
We, who have eyes to see, SEE IT IN ONE ANOTHER. We hear it audibly in one another. Love never fails….even with the loss of my dear friend….this child reminded me how many more I have to touch “with loving hands, hugs, and heart/my mission of service.”
Happy Thanksgiving! Until next month, take care . . . I care . . .
Always,
“Golria” D. Benish, Ph.D.
Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”
Greetings and good evening from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley! Hope everyone has prepared for winter. Speaking of “Hope,” I have been handing some out freely to those who are looking weary, frightened, or overwhelmed. Being inspired a few weeks ago, I ventured into (yet) another eccentric creative project. Using bags of over-sized plastic Easter eggs, I filled them with an individually wrapped Fortune Cookie and wrote a variety of inspirational quotes to put one in each to uplift people who cross my path.
Examples: Miracle Healing Ministry/Dr. Gloria D. Benish, (Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”) here in Stevensville, wishes you HOPE and great fortune:
HOPE (noun):
The feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best.
(verb): To look “forward to” with desire and reasonable confidence.
*****
Miracle Healing Ministry/Dr. Gloria D. Benish, (Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”) here in Stevensville, wishes you HOPE and great fortune:
HOPE: (noun) The belief that anything is possible, the only thing stronger than fear, deep-rooted faith.
*****
Miracle Healing Ministry/Dr. Gloria D. Benish, (Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”) here in Stevensville, wishes you HOPE and great fortune:
HOPE: The difference between hanging on and not giving up, a glimmer of sunshine in the wake of a storm, the best is yet to come.
*****
Every day is an opportunity to assist humanity in my belief. It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money or time, just willingness to be of service to our beloved. Life on planet earth is difficult, at best, right now. Even for us spiritual folk from time to time as I will refer to later in this column.
Beginning at the start of October, my birthday was on October 5th. Twenty-seven years ago on that day, LuAnn Stallcop took me (and my gifts) public. Until then, no one had even heard about me. The ripple effect of that evening so long ago still has an impact on others in the now and I will be forever grateful.
At a local meeting in my home a couple weeks ago, I had a new gentleman arrive for our little spiritual gathering. In drawing information out of him, he revealed that he just celebrated his 68th birthday. In a playful tone, I related that I had just celebrated my birthday, as well – and added, “And so far, I really like being 69.” Pointing to my head, I said in a silly statement, “But I still feel and believe I’m 17!” He giggled quietly and surprised us all by saying, “When I was 17, I liked 69, also!” I watched the reaction of the other guests to see if his statement was a little too raw for them…but you could tell they much more appreciated him “being real” than finding any offense to his comment.
Our monthly gathering that day was an incredible experience, unlike any other meeting we have had. Prior to the actual gathering, I received a call from a member, relating she would be unable to attend due to severe pain. I offered to do “love-light” across the miles and mentioned that if she would agree to come, I would open myself to be used for a spiritual healing prior to the group arriving. She agreed to do so
For three days this past week, I painted and prepared a gathering room here in my home for our members to gather in during autumn and winter. The woman arrived and I took her into this warm inviting relaxed atmosphere and provided an instantaneous healing from all her discomfort, up to and including pain from a broken foot many years earlier. I could hear people arriving, but had left another member to welcome them as they arrived. INSTANTANEOUS MIRACLE #1
Completing the healing, I opened the meeting with introductions of a new guest. Each member spoke briefly to introduce themselves. I gave updates that I had recently received and the conversations flowed comfortably amongst the group. I also introduced the idea that twice a month, I will have “game night” here at my home. I have created an Inspirational Board Game that helps people trust their intuition and insights, builds bonds with family and friends, uplifts, and offers Divine Guidance. By giving people a wholesome atmosphere to take time to play together and feel loved, our members welcome the opportunity to do so. We also discussed meeting twice a month, rather than only once. Those who couldn’t join us today, but wanted to, will have another opportunity rather than waiting an entire month to participate.
I also offered the availability of this room to these members, to use their gifts to help others for teaching, training, or workshops. They are excited to do so, in order to reach out to the community of those in need. This is all very exciting!
Several of our members (myself included) have died and returned. The conversation began with one and then another about their personal experiences. I happened to mention that I empathically felt a child shot and killed in a Brazil school shooting and was stunned that there was NO PAIN when it occurred. The bullet going in the front of the boy’s head and exiting through the left back lower skull made the body jerk violently throughout in an instant, but with no physical pain.
One of our members got up from her seat and walked out of the room. I assumed she was going to the restroom. A second member was following her, which seemed odd, so I too followed her to my driveway. She was standing there crying and softly explained through her tears that her 19-year-old son had committed suicide by shooting himself in the head in front of her. I apologized for what I had spoken inside, so sorry that I had triggered her pain.
I offered her a healing hug and she said, “No, that’s okay…I’m fine.” I replied, “Sweetheart, you aren’t fine – I can feel a deep-rooted sob in your lower gut.”
“Give me a hug and don’t let go until I tell you,” I stated and she complied. She was much taller than me and the hug for me was difficult to hold her. I asked her to follow me to my front porch step so I could stand up one step taller to hold her in my arms. She resisted, embarrassed the neighbors would see and I squelched her fear by saying, “My neighbors are used to seeing me do this with the public.” She released her fear and fell into my arms with relief as I said once again, “Give me a hug and don’t let go until I tell you.” As I held her in my arms, she cried. Within minutes, I FELT the release and knew she was relieved of the heartache finally and would be able to speak of this experience with no further emotional attachment. We re-entered the home together and re-joined the meeting. INSTANTANEOUS MIRACLE #2
A conversation was in full swing with a male member explaining spiritual activity of becoming the “Bride of Christ” in Holy Oneness and had captivated everyone’s attention. The entire flow of the Holy Spirit brought each member closer.
As this discussion ended, the woman who had walked away from the group now felt SAFE to share the entire reason she walked out and the experience, re-telling in DETAIL, but with no tears or emotional charge. She now knew she would be of assistance to help others more effectively in dealing with the issue of suicide and loss. Amazing. Simply AMAZING GRACE!
Spontaneously, from hearing her story, another member opened up and talked about her mother abusing her during childhood and the many harsh and violent things she experienced. Sobbing as she rehearsed her painful childhood, I walked over to her and asked her to stand and turn with her back so the members couldn’t see her crying as I held her. In safety being in my arms, she cried a river of tears. Trying to release from the hug sooner than I wanted her to, I asked her to not let go until I told her. The incredible amount of heat (excess electricity in her head) needed to be transmuted. Within minutes, she too was re-balanced and healed. INSTANTANEOUIS MIRACLE #3
I happened to look over at our newest member, sensing that he was feeling awkward about so many tears. I approached and sat next to him, leaned in and whispered, “Our group isn’t usually like this. Generally, we are discussing intel … I hope this isn’t making you feel uncomfortable today.” I had taken his right hand in mine and using my left hand, I was drawn to his upper left shoulder, which was blazing hot – an imbalance in his energy field – filled with pain. I began automatically doing a soft figure eight, open-handed wash in that area, relieving his discomfort. INSTANTANEOUS MIRACLE #4
I realized I had never even asked if he wanted my help and questioned, “Do you mind if I am fondling your back?” He replied, “Not at all.” Again, I asked if this was overwhelming him and he replied that he was raised in a Pentecostal church and he was completely comfortable witnessing laying-on-of-hands, supernatural etc.
Another member who has been caretaking an extremely ill sister, who is overwhelmed and feeling run-down approached and asked me to do love-light on her, as well. She was concerned that the stress was going to make her ill, as well … so I placed my hands on her and beefed up her energy field. Immediately following, she walked over and held another member who was weeping, giving comfort. INSTANTANEOUIS MIRACLE #5
As a group, offering a gathering from 2-4 p.m., found ourselves at 3:50 p.m. and I hadn’t even fed them. I explained that by becoming members of the spiritually-based Connecting Consciousness Organization, it had provided this opportunity to meet, to find one another, and to keep ourselves strong to be available to others through this dark night of the soul for our loved ones. We each felt blessed, sat at my table to enjoy a meal made with loving hands, and followed with dessert. In this safe environment, a mini-version of the humanitarian project I applied for as Mother Hope’s House or the Spiritual Boot Kamp proved the success of how I choose to serve God and humanity. These members on that day were well-wishers, hoping that the project I applied for gets chosen and each offered to help in any way possible to make it a reality for others.
At 5:15, we said our good-byes and love you’s, each looking forward to our next gathering.
I hope the recap of this meeting provided you with a warm feeling of excitement that these kinds of groups will never get boring and each of you should consider beginning one in your area. Each gathering is different and it’s interesting how everyone who needs to be present for whatever will occur is perfect and divinely decreed for the highest good of everyone.
Earlier in this article, I explained that life right now is even difficult for us spiritually-minded folk. My editor on the East Coast texted last night and asked if I had time to talk. I related that I wasn’t in a very good mood and another time may be better for me. She was stunned that I experience human feelings. I assured her that I am still human and can have “bumps in the road” like anyone else.
I recently had someone help themselves to two of my favorite patriotic sweatshirts. Long story short, I called them out on it to return them and apologize. I explained, “At this stage of humanity’s evolution, all darkness is being brought to the light. Now is not the time to be an asshole.” In the past generations, deceit and corruption could lie dormant and not be discovered. Things are changing on our planet and there is HOPE.
I let these two individuals (who “borrowed my things without permission”) know that I may appear meek (or a doormat,) but I can still put on the full Armor of God and come out blazing, mouthy and hurtful. However, although I don’t like confrontation, it is a conscious choice to handle my feelings in a spiritual manner. The loss of physical sweatshirts is not the issue. My anger stems from what they stand for in my walk with God for this nation. Can I live without them? Yes. Could I go on-line and purchase something similar myself? Yes. Do I want to? No.
Can I live without these individuals? Yes. I have lost Kirk, my mom and dad, Nikki, and my pets Patch and Baby. I survived these losses, as well as being raped violently. If I can’t trust the very people who say they want to be part of a healing center for humanity – or even a small ministry in my home, WTF?!
I explained that the Collective Consciousness needs to be healed of these issues. Can we take a material sense into the Kingdom of Heaven (spiritual consciousness)? No.
I have been judged because I live in a glass house and my entire life is in book form. Some “friends” state that they fear lack of privacy with me. I change names, accordingly, if there are sensitive issues that would embarrass people, but I relate the spiritual lesson in order to teach others. I am setting an example for humanity and question, “If they have something to hide – why not heal it, or better yet, why do they even want to be around me if they are paranoid, that I might reveal their shortcomings? Heck, I have enough of my own…I don’t need to borrow anyone else’s.
A dear friend texted me this week, volunteering that while helping his son – he kept prodding him and telling him he should be doing better. Rather than bonking him on the head or telling him he was wrong, I responded with unsolicited advice:
People KNOW WHEN THEY AREN’T DOING THEIR BEST. Rather than prodding, try encouraging instead. They already know they are falling short of the mark and don’t take kindly to being reminded of it.
Encourage – don’t discourage people more than they already are. Take the time to uplift one another. As I said in the beginning of this article, it doesn’t take a lot of time or money. If you have a few extra seconds in line at a grocery store, be kind, offer a compliment freely. Tell people how much you love and appreciate them. Love is the highest frequency. Every kindness ripples much further than you can even see or fathom.
An overly-stressed mother in a store, wrestling three children literally almost collapsed with relief when I commented, “Mother’s can do anything…you are amazing handling three of them while you are shopping.”
A teenager, not hearing compliments at home of anything he/she is doing right – and only hears everything a parent is disappointed in can snap and not give a crap (which rhymes!), turning to a gang or drugs to relieve their stress.
A man receiving a compliment may go home and not shoot himself following a genuine loving compliment that he is making a difference in his family’s life.
As a growing humanity, being stretched beyond our capacity, we must remember we are always doing the best we can with the awareness we have. We do better as we know better.
Take the time, make a difference in the lives of loved ones and strangers – not because of karma, but because you can do it.
Greetings and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley! We got snow up on our mountain last night. (Here we go, again……) It has been such a busy month. It feels like I have been running a marathon. People coming, staying longer than they anticipated, and leaving as the next people are arriving. Telephone calls and meetings. Meals and prepping. Errands and housecleaning (HOME AND SELF!) Harvesting gardens and outdoor chores, and preparing for winter. It is exhausting! Add a few solar flares and flaring tempers of loved ones and you have your hands full with mixed emotions and fire crackers ready to pop.
Does this sound all too familiar in your lives, as well?
Wars and rumors of wars. Propaganda machines filling the air with doomsday possible false flags, division with politics and beliefs. Friends and relatives on both sides stating, “I just don’t understand WHY THEY CAN’T SEE THE TRUTH!” Rising prices on everything make you suck wind, with everyone’s hand out to take more and more.
And, where does it end? I would rather talk about the beginning and then see where this all leads.
Thirty-one years ago, I was living in Granbury Texas and preparing to leave a 19-year marriage. I had met an older lady before I even got moved in, while still staying in a motel (waiting for furniture to be delivered) and had a few lunches with her. Nearing my departure date, she called and asked if she could stop by. Of course, I agreed to the arrival of a guest.
Upon entering my home, she came into the kitchen. Before she even took a seat at my kitchen table, she began talking how imperative it was for her coming. She had a message from God for me. That piqued my interest!
She began to speak, “When I was a small child, I lived on a ranch here in Texas that was failing. My father had put it up for sale and a gentleman came to look at it.” Almost painfully, she continued speaking, “In front of the prospective buyer, I cried out to my father, “Oh, daddy, our ranch is worth a lot of money – please don’t sell it” and he back-handed me. I flew through the air, hit a fence post and slumped to the ground. As I was picking myself up off the ground, in severe pain, Dad responded, “If I want to hear your opinion, I’ll ask for it.”
Her story ended as she spoke, “The new buyer discovered oil on our property.”
She continued, “Since that day, I seldom tell people that I have a special gift. Only when I feel strongly compelled . . . do I ever share things I know, but today is one of those days.”
Her first message to me is private concerning my ex-husband and I don’t want to put the information into print. There is no need to make him appear bad in relation to my subject at hand. (Suffice it to say, I had always suspected…women know these things. We can pretend otherwise or be in denial, but truthfully – we always KNOW.)
However, following the detailed message, she now turned her attention to me completely for the “rest of the story.” Looking eye-to-eye with me and aware I had already written three books, she continued. She also knew that I had sent many queries to spiritual and mainstream publishers and had heaps of rejections. She said, “I know you are trying to get published and maybe you will and maybe you won’t. But the thing you most need to know is that when you are in your sixties, you will finally do what you came to do.”
THUD! My heart hit the wall! I was 38 years old and hearing “in my sixties, I will do what I came to do?!” Man! That sounded like a lifetime away, but yet – overnight, in the blink of an eye – I am in my sixties. On October 5th, I will be turning 69 years old. Last year/last chance in my 60’s “to do what I came to do” before the calendar rolls into my 70’s to fulfill this woman’s prophetic words.
In these past months, I have reviewed my life of preparation for age 69. Granting of a humanitarian project is before me. This country and humanity are in turmoil and friends and relatives are agitated and anxious… And here I calmly sit saying, “I am unafraid, I am at peace,” answering my telephone or opening the front door to those who are quite the opposite. All the preparation and spiritual growth (and gifts given) have prepared me for what is at hand.
Last Saturday night, I had guests sitting in my kitchen playing the Inspirational boardgame I created almost two decades ago that I have still never taken to Press. During the game, an issue came forward of my guest, Raylene, venting about her mother and the heartache and pain she still carries – limiting her from going forward.
I asked Raylene to stand in front of my refrigerator for an exercise. I opened my cabinets and asked her to hold out her hands to help me for a moment. I started taking pots and pans out of the cupboard and stacking them in her outstretched hands. The burden to hold so much weight was getting cumbersome and exhausting to hold as I piled more and more on her.
She finally reached her limit and cried out, “I can’t hold any more! I am about to drop them!” Smiling and giggling, “I said, “It’s about time to let it all go. You can’t be open to receive the new if you don’t let go of the past.” We discussed how long she had carried the burden of resentment and anger, frustration, and even hate. It was time to let it all go for what is forthcoming in newness and goodness.
If, in my 60’s, I’m here to do what I came to do – perhaps it is to inspire you to love your Country, God, and Humanity the way I am able to do and set an example to follow? I have this patriotic thing going on right now…well, ever since 2020 and crazy started. I wrote an article for Connecting Consciousness newsletter this week and it follows:
Kindness Korner
September, 2022 (Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.)
As the Event Host for Stevensville and our Community Project, it has been put on my heart to promote PATRIOTISM in not only the Bitterroot Valley, but for Montana as a whole. Widely stated that we are “Big Sky,” we are also referred to as “God’s Country.” As one state in this nation, we CC members all agree that we will “hold the line” (light) for humanity.
Being well known here in Stevensville, I have been on a “must-see list” for Christmas and holidays for 31 years. It would be my over-lighted home that creates that glow in the western sky. On the 4th of July every year, I have an extensive number of red/white/blue lights (draping from my gutter and around my yard), 50 flags, 50 pinwheels, signs of patriotism, and flag solar lights. This past summer, two children on bikes stopped, knocked, and asked, “Did you put that many flags out because you want us to take one?” I offered them each a flag and thought how cute they were to knock and ask to ride around with a flag.
They returned and asked, “Did you put that many pinwheels out because you want us to take one of them, also?” Of course, they rode away with a pinwheel, as well. I remember the day and event well enough to speak of it now. They, as children, will carry it as a memory too.
For 31 years, I have kept a tally of each child who comes to my door at Halloween. It numbers in the 600’s that evening. A well-lighted atmosphere, safe for little children and adults who arrive for my homemade caramel-chewy pull-apart popcorn balls. Always dressed for a theme each year, being playful and safe – I am the house where locals come for treats.
For this Halloween, I have been in preparation. I have added more strings of red/white/blue lights. Our country is so dark right now and the Satanic holiday is being transformed this year in this neighborhood home to celebrate PATRIOTISM EVERY DAY AND HOLIDAY OF THE YEAR. My costume is a U.S. flag dress and a blue cowboy hat to match the stars. I have ordered red/white/blue wrapped Tootsie Rolls and Butter Mints, along with patriotic pencils/erasers/pencil sharpeners for hand-outs this year.
I will have the National Anthem, America the Beautiful, “we’ll put a boot in their ass” (“Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue”) and “I’m proud to be an American” blaring loudly through the neighborhood that evening.
I have been dressing PATRIOTICALLY every time I go out in public for weeks, building to a crescendo for Halloween and then Thanksgiving and Christmas. Some may see me as the crazy old eccentric bat in Stevensville. Most people who see or hear my plan give me a thumbs-up and verbal gratitude for doing what I am doing. It doesn’t matter to me If I am judged as a nut, because it is worth it to me to see a smile on someone’s face – or if they point and laugh. Both are lightening up Montana and our nation/world. Dr. Glo-bug, a Patriot, here at your service and “Just here to LIGHTEN THINGS UP.” My motto for our local group is: STAY IN LOVE, NOT FEAR. CHOP WOOD/CARRY WATER…AND JUST DON’T BE AN ASSHOLE. BE THE DIFFERENCE YOU SEEK.
As for your friends, family, strangers, or new acquaintances, I would like to share the theme song of my local spiritual group I hosted for seven years for women and our one “token man”:
Put your Hand in My Hand
(Words & Music by Teresa Jennings)
Put your hand in my hand. You can be my friend.
We don’t have to look the same to let our voices blend.
We can trust each other. We can try again.
If you put your hand in my hand, I will be your friend.
We can share this whole world. We can understand.
We don’t have to think the same to stand here hand in hand.
We can live together, learning to depend.
If you put your hand in my hand, I will be your friend.
At the beginning of today’s article, I asked, “Where does it end?” I began at the beginning, to bring you to the end. Our country and world has lived for generations with lies, manipulation, evil-doing, corruption, and unnecessary conflict. The time to stand united is NOW as all the darkness is being brought to the surface. We don’t have to think the same to stand united, our goals are the same to stand in freedom of choice. It takes all of us to be complete in unity and independence.
I have never attempted to change anyone’s mind, beliefs, attitude, or opinion. I listen open-mindedly, knowing my perceptions may differ – but I love individual’s more than politics, religion, finances, or belief structures. I received a call last night that forewarned that the next few weeks would be especially difficult for humanity…a “doomsday message of forthcoming events” and whether it is a rumor or will come to pass, I would ask you to lay down your differences and instead, hold hands/not resentments, judgments or who is right or wrong…but to lend a hand-up to someone He puts on your path.
We have some pesky humans in our midst who would like to thwart our constitutional privileges and have America fall on her face. As the mother of two disabled Vets and a proud Patriot of this country…I am going to bow down to Christ principles, stand in honor of what America stands for and keep the faith in God and humanity to do the right thing. The ending is just around the corner. It has been very heavy for many of us to hold, knowing the truth and being set free from the drama. It wasn’t that we are special in being forerunners, we signed on to be of service. If you can feel the truth in anything I have spoken today, you’re here to help “hold the line”/love light. Thank you, in advance, for your service to God, country, and humanity.
Until next month, take care…I care…
Always,
Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.
Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”
Greetings and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley! Today’s theme is going to encompass two messages that will hopefully inspire you in our world today.
Never make a plan – because it WILL change.
It takes a Village . . .
Over a month ago, I received a call of distress from an elder friend. Her rent had been raised $50.00. Living on a fixed income, she didn’t have the extra required and was asking me to reach out to others to seek charity. I knew how it could be solved effortlessly, I would just be the silent benefactor and take care of it.
Intuitively, she must have realized and made a call to me and stated emphatically, “I don’t want YOU to be responsible for this.” I never received a call-back of her becoming homeless and felt assured things had worked out for her.
However, just a few weeks later here in the Bitterroot, I had nine friends contact me. Each told me the same story, but with various reasons, “I have just been evicted and have until the end of August to vacate.
On the eighth call, I listened to my answering machine. On it, Debra stated, “I have just been evicted from my apartment.” I called her back quickly and stated, “Debra, I am going to say something and then I am going to laugh and perhaps you will, also. I am not laughing because it’s funny HA-HA, and it isn’t that I’m not compassionate . . . but maybe you will be laughing, too.”
Before I continued, I said, “I just have to ask one question. Do you have to be out by the end of August?” She said, “Yes.”
Sorry, but I did start giggling as I related, “Seven other people in seven days have called me with the same situation. You are number 8 on the list and at least you are in the top 10!”
Thank God she did start laughing, rather than crying – or I would have felt like a horrible person for handling the conversation the way I did. She cried out, “In fact, you have made me feel sooo much better because it’s NOT JUST ME being singled out.”
For me, I had plans made to attend my 51st class reunion in Sturgis. We missed our 50th because of Covid. I had planned for months to attend, although I graduated from Arizona – not Sturgis. Friends from that era included me, however, and I was thrilled that I would get to go see my youthful friends again. But it seemed that God had other plans for me and I wrote the letter to deny my attendance:
August 11, 2022
Hello Fellow Classmates!
I didn’t graduate with you, but was invited by Sheila Limbo to join in your fun. I have planned on it since arrival of the invitation. I have enjoyed receiving updates on all you characters and have felt sadness for the loss of those in our class.
Requested to catch people up during the last 50 years would be a novel. There are plenty of highlights (and low lights,) but to be brief:
I married at age 18, divorced 19 years later.
Remarried and spent 16 years raising his two kids and my son and daughter. Today is actually the anniversary of his death. He died doing what he loved most (being a prospector and having his own gold claim.) He fell off a mountain, shoved his right femur up through the right ball joint of his hip and died four weeks later of blood clots. My life changed that day in 23 minutes. I remain a widow.
I received my Ph.D. in 1996 in religious studies. Ordained as a minister in 1995, I marry ‘em and bury ‘em. In the same year, I created a Miracle Healing (Prison) Ministry. Convicts “make it look easy” getting behind bars. With tremendous red-tape, I was accepted to be an inspirational speaker behind bars and had my “captive audience.” Teasingly, I call myself “Dr. Glo-bug (Just here “to lighten things up.”)
Besides the ministry corporation, I also own and operate Miracle Publishing & Distribution. As a “third generation motor mouth,” I now have 11 inspirational/self-help books in print and four to edit to go to press. I am a motivational speaker nationally and internationally.
I live 24 minutes south of Missoula, Montana in Stevensville….in the heart of the beautiful Bitterroot Valley. I feel like I am on vacation every day, looking at this beauty. Until last summer,
our family still owned the little yellow house on Fulton Street behind where the Ford Company used to be. With my mother’s passing in 2021, us kids finally sold the property. To each of us, it still felt like HOME.
My strengths come from my love for God, family, and country. My yard still has 50 flags, decorations and red/white/blue lights in it. You wondered what that glow in the Western skies is? Umm…that would be my home!
I am unable to attend because of trauma and drama in the lives of my loved ones. In seven days, for various reasons, nine of my friends have lost their homes and are being forced to relocate by the end of August. With tremendous compassion, I have opened my home and could potentially become “tent city,” giving them refuge. I know this situation is occurring everywhere. As much as I would love to “come out and play,” see Barb Barnes-DeGroff and so many others … my place is here, for now. I will look forward to updates on Facebook.
Being a cup half full – and being the little eternal optimist – I visualize a wonderful experience for all of you!
I believe, with God, this world will be turned right-side-up and we will become a civil humanity,
Thank you for the invitation. To the team who organized it all – you get an A+ and ten stars: **********
Enjoy! HAVE FUN AND BE SAFE!
Sincerely,
Gloria D. (Hale) Benish, Ph.D.
**********
Changes in plans have occurred all through August for others and myself. You have to just “go with the flow” as it is all occurring . . . letting go and just being “along for the ride.” God is placing His kids in exact positions of where He wants them to be.
My daughter had company arriving and called last week asking me to help by being a “White Tornado” and getting her home cleaned quickly, with a guest arriving for a week. Momma came to the rescue.
Later that evening, she called to thank me, “Momma, I just wanted to thank you for coming to my rescue and handling the parts of life that I am a failure at: cleaning my house and home-schooling my kid.” I assured her, “You are NOT a failure Danielle, it takes a village to support one another through this life.” I ended the conversation by saying, “And by the way, I just hope I am smart enough to get Kathryn graduated from the 5th grade! I had to ask Google what “predicate” meant on the first day of home-schooling because 57 years have passed since I have ever even heard the word and learning what it meant.”
Personally, I have planned for a month to have the Montana CONNECTING CONSCIOUSNESS Coordinator and her husband in my home for four days this week. Along with their visit, I would be hosting an all-day workshop, a prayer ceremony at Lolo Pass, and my regular monthly face-to-face gathering in my home for 15-20 participants. It was a plan set in stone. Or, not! Yesterday, through a series of circumstances, the entire week was cancelled. It was a “God-thing,” because it worked out to the highest good of everyone concerned.
Talking with a friend this week in Phoenix and sharing the stories I have just related herein; she responded that 1,800 people A DAY are being evicted from their homes. It made the amount I am attempting to help feel miniscule. She also said that so many illegal immigrants in Phoenix, with lack of police force to stand up against the crime has Phoenix being a Hell Hole. I find myself feeling blessed that He put only 9 on my doorstep and heart to help!
It is the times we are in. It is the time for which we were born to live our spiritual understanding, not just talk about it. We were each born for such a time as this. To lighten things up with the Presence of God that shines through us.
God’s Hand is in all of this. Not done as a punishment, but to place us each where He wants and needs us to be.
I tried for years after Kirk died, to leave the Bitterroot Valley. Every attempt failed and I remained here . . . exactly where He wanted me.
I have one of my friends parked on my curb in a camper, one living in my home. It is yet to be seen whether I become a “Soup Kitchen” and “Tent City,” but I will be a safety net for those in need. I don’t think for a moment “that it’s NOT my job,” because it is. It is every one of us to have it be our jobs to be that “Village” to help support one another.
I am not the Savior/Rescuer – but I AM the teacher, transferring my knowledge to others of “how to plug in Directly to make that personal connection.”
Years ago, I was having a discussion/argument with God. I cried out, “I can’t feed that many people.” He used the back of His hand to push my human personality out of the way as He said, “I CAN.” He also asked me to do something else I didn’t feel qualified to do and I said, “I can’t do that, either.” A second time, He used the back of His hand to push my human personality out of the way and said, “I CAN.” He spoke with authority, I can only BELIEVE and TRUST.
Like many others, I too live on a fixed income. He has CONTINUALLLY demonstrated that I have everything I need, usually before I know I need it. People drop off unexpected groceries, someone sends an unexpected donation, someone gifts me with boxes of clothing because they don’t know anyone small my size, or a man shows up on my front curb and fixes my housemate’s vehicle (with no out-of-pocket expense) for her.
The signs and wonders are all around us, we just need the eyes to see. I AM the rock, the stable stone on which many depend. It isn’t the human Gloria I am talking about, please understand. That Divine Presence within me unfolds daily and dazzles even me, giving me the energy/the words/the sustenance for others and self (only as long as I am willing to share) and He shows me that none of it can be depleted once you make that connection.
We are on the cusp, getting ready to make that giant leap, the one we have all waited for. The transformation is happening. Watch, look, and listen to that inner voice and obey.
I seldom give unsolicited advice, but I feel compelled to say it anyway. STOP making plans and you will save yourself unnecessary disappointment. Make your connection first thing in the morning and if you find yourself lost, reconnect for two minutes on the hour, and watch where He will lead you. Also, BE WILLING to BE THE VILLAGE of support for one another – they aren’t taking “from you,” they are drawing on that infinite source WITHIN YOU.
Until next month, take care . . . I care . . .
Always,
Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.
Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”
Greetings and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley! I have just returned from a two-week trip to Nebraska. It feels good to be home! I have been home for three days and still haven’t unpacked the car yet. I have been a little busy.
The day I left, I had an interview with Simon Parkes, the Founder of “Connecting Consciousness” in London. I was applying for a position as Event Host here in Stevensville. The position called for nothing more than who I just am. I was approached by the Montana Coordinator a couple months ago to apply for the position, in fact. She thought I would be perfect for the job. FYI, if you have never heard of this organization, you can find it on the internet by going to: www.connectingconsciousness.org.
During my interview, I happened to blurt out, “Oh my God, Simon, I LOVE YOU so much!” I am sure I immediately blushed. I have never told a prospective employer that I LOVE them! The words came out so passionately, it surprised even me. He giggled and thanked me.
I had to bite my tongue to not say, “I have always wanted to meet someone famous, besides JUST JESUS.” It isn’t that I wanted to meet him “just because he was famous.” I am a fan, but not for that reason. He is an independent journalist I listen to, because I don’t listen to Mainstream News to get information.
When I am listening to Simon, his voice in relating what is going on in the world isn’t delivered in a fear-based tone. His voice is soft and gentle, reassuring a listener that things are under control. He is spiritual in delivery of his messages to humanity. I resonate strongly with his delivery, his spirit, his intention, and his goal to help humanity.
A year ago, Simon provided a thread to apply for a humanitarian project. Wanting a Center to expand what I already do through my home on a small scale, I put in a request for the Bitterroot Valley to have a healing center created. I am awaiting word that my request has been granted.
The day after my interview, while driving towards Nebraska, I was informed that I had been hired to be the Stevensville Event Host. Trish, the woman who had suggested that I should apply, said she was probably more excited than me that I had gotten the position. My only reasoning to substantiate her feelings is because, for me, nothing has changed – except that I am now doing it under the Connecting Consciousness banner. I have hosted thousands of dinners/meetings/events. It just comes naturally to me.
It was requested of me to write a blurb that would be sent out to members in order to RSVP a meeting invitation. I submitted it this morning to Trish. It reads:
Greetings and good afternoon! I am Dr. Gloria D. Benish, the Stevensville Event Host. I am cordially inviting you to join our fantastic members and me for the upcoming Connecting Consciousness face-to-face gathering. (My nickname is “Dr. Glo-bug” – just here “to lighten things up.”)
From my perspective, these meetings are a breath of fresh air amongst the woes in the world or in family/friend situations who don’t share the same perceptions. This group gives you a place in your head and heart to come in order to feel loved, relaxed, share without judgment, and to voice your thoughts and feelings. A place to be wholly accepted just for being the wonderful you that you are. Everyone I have met so far in CC is extremely gifted, open-minded, and open-hearted!
I will give you fair warning: I am a “food pusher.” I love to feed people spiritually and physically, so bring an appetite for spirit and physical food. My personal goal (as your CC Event Host), with you as my guest, is to have you feel filled full and full filled. I want you “armed for bear” with your departure hug … that you are so satisfied and filled to the brim that you burp love wherever you go, until we meet again.
I am looking forward to spending time with you … or perhaps meeting you for the first time! Hope you can join us!!
I love meeting new “like-minded” individuals! It gives me an opportunity to love more people. JOB SECURITY!
I look forward to having many more face-to-face gatherings in my home and hope that it will expand to having a Center big enough to hold all of us. The current group ranges from 12-15 people at present. Just enough seating on my covered back porch and to fit into my tiny kitchen space. We are packed in here like sardines, but no one is complaining about the space. I receive gratitude for providing such a peaceful, safe environment to talk freely and no one wants to leave.
Yesterday, two women showed up three hours early, thinking they would arrive early to help me because I’d been on an extended trip. I was organized, however, and we got to enjoy each other’s company before the others arrived. Two women at the end of the day ended up staying three hours after the others left, comfortable on my patio becoming new friends. For me, my first face-to-face gathering as “Event Host” became a nine-hour day with guests. Is this Heaven or what?!
JOB SECURITY. Could anyone be more blessed when your “job” is loving people and uniting with others who are seeking it and a place to experience love?
Sometimes, my “job of loving” takes me on a road trip. Eighteen hours of driving to Nebraska was another job opportunity for me.
Two months ago, my youngest sibling Sheila called and asked if I could help her on a mission in O’Neill, Nebraska to help my Aunt Alice. My cousin/caretaker Shirley is trying to move to Oklahoma City and trying to downsize Alice to go with her. My Uncle Sonny was a trucker, with a large diesel shop in the backyard. They had his parent’s farm, five storage units, and Shirley and Alice’s home/diesel shop to prepare for auction. To say it was going to be overwhelming was an under-statement!
Coco (my house-mate) agreed to go with me to be of assistance. We arrived and were given our job assignments. Coco would help Sheila and Shirley. I would be taking care of Aunt Alice and cooking breakfast/lunch/dinner and taking care of household duties.
Three exhausted women, after long hours of packing and moving everything to trailers to the farm to be sold at the auction would come into the air-conditioned home and sit down to relax and eat. They didn’t need to worry about prep or clean-up. We worked together like a well-oiled machine.
Before I left Montana, I was working at the computer and printing out a manuscript. I finished the project and noticed that I only had about 30 pieces of paper left. My thoughts were these: (1) As soon as I get back from Nebraska, I need to make a trip to Costco and get some paper on hand. (2) Judging myself, I thought, “What kind of an author/PUBLISHER has only 30 pieces of paper on hand?!!”
While in Nebraska, Sheila called and asked me to come to one of the storage units. They had something for me that Shirley thought I could use. I arrived and was asked to back my van up to the unit. I did and three women loaded BOXES, with reams of paper, into my vehicle! A kiss on the forehead from God, eh?
On the drive back home, I told Coco, “I have a feeling that I’ll be writing another book soon because we always have everything we need, usually before we know we need it.”
The day before I left, Shirley asked me to come to the bedroom. She said, “I would like to give you something in gratitude for coming to help.” A lump, so big I couldn’t speak, blocked my words from speaking and tears filled my eyes. Through tears, I slowly gathered the words and spoke, “Aunt Alice took care of me every summer of my youth, it’s been my pleasure to take care of her in her final chapters.”
When I arrived, I explained to Alice that I am who I am as a result of having her as my role model. She worked like a dog her entire life, with a smile on her face. She was tender and loving, she was a fabulous cook and no one left her home hungry, except by choice. Throughout her life, she lived the principles of Christ – kind, caring, thoughtful, loving, patient, helpful. She had integrity and said what she meant and meant what she said. The gift she gave everyone in the family and extended family of neighbors and community was LOVE in all forms of the word, unconditionally.
I was fortunate to have her as a role model. I was fortunate to drive 18 hours, one direction, to have that special alone-time with my Aunt Alice. The thought of being paid anything to be of assistance to her was non-negotiable. The time together was priceless.
Our days were spent chatting about our past and watching Hallmark together. The final movie we watched together was about a woman who took five Hallmark cards and sent them to five people who had made a difference in the actress’s life. I was inspired to do the same when I got home, to send Alice a Hallmark card and tell her what a difference she made in my life.
When I returned to Montana, I went to the store and read card-after-card and alas, there wasn’t one that would express what a difference she had made in my life. I thought, “If Hallmark can’t say it …. I’ll say it myself..”
From my heart, in remembering daily moments of her watching me as a child, my favorite memory was this. I had been playing outside with Shirley’s brother Jim who was my age. We were partners in crime, swinging off the house with Uncle Sonny’s Weeping Willow tree, playing Tarzan (which we KNEW we would be whipped for later with the broken branches. But it was so much fun, we did it anyway. Alice wasn’t the disciplinarian … Uncle Sonny was! Ouch. Those branches stung!)
Anyway, called in for lunch, I washed my hands and sat at the table. Aunt Alice had prepared my favorite meat loaf, baked potatoes, baked acorn squash, sliced cucumbers and onions that had marinated in vinegar, and a Kool Aid in a purple metal tumbler that sweated beads that dripped from the cold/hot air exchange. You could taste the absolute love she had felt as she probably hummed or sang while she was prepping the food! To this day, it is my favorite meal, but that day … it was a perfect day sitting at my aunt’s table and being served with her loving hands and heart.
Every summer, until I was 14, I had Aunt Alice to look up to. Now, at 90, she is shorter than me – shrunk in stature, but not in admiration. One afternoon, while I was prepping a dinner, she was walking S L O W L Y through the kitchen at a snail’s pace without her walker or a cane. I asked her teasingly, “And where do you think you’re going?” She smiled and replied, “Honey, I’m just running to the bathroom for a minute.” I giggled and asked, “That’s running?!”
Hallmark is a sweet channel. But life can be, as well. With our family and friends, we are all playing roles. The relationship between my aunt and me or who we are by nature, I can assure you – NONE of it is “ACTING.” It is all very real. If you have never experienced having an Aunt Alice/a role model to look up to, I would encourage you to become a member of Connecting Consciousness and RSVP to come to a Stevensville face-to-face gathering here at my home. I will introduce you to my aunt living very much alive through me …
Until next month, take care – I care …
Always,
Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.
(Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”)
Greetings, good morning, and HAPPY FATHER’S DAY gentlemen! (As well as single mommy’s who play that role, as well.) I hope each of you are being showered with love and appreciation today.
It has been a busy month since I last wrote. There have been highlights and lowlights, of course. That is just called life on planet earth. Miraculous healings occurred instantaneously. I am hardly surprised at all by anything placed before me after all these years. As my home is a Healing Center, it is open to people to call at any hour of the day or night without judgment. My home is a refuge as a church would (or should) be at any hour and why I sometimes refer to it “As the House of God.”
Receiving a call to arrive at 11:30 p.m. a woman brought me an ill dog because she couldn’t afford an emergency Vet bill. Quickly, I was able to calm the dog’s pounding heart and anxiety and I soon discovered that this time together was only to give the woman three more days to ease her more comfortably into the transition of her pet. We, who have loved an animal like a child, know these feelings well.
When she realized the inevitable, she texted and asked if I would drive to her home and keep her from jumping off a bridge. Was she joking? If you received a text like that, would you “blow it off” or would you respond and not take any chances of her being serious? A cry for help is a cry for help. We are “our brother’s (sister’s) keeper,” so before I jumped into the car and drove to Missoula to spend a couple days with her, I responded:
“No bungy jumping allowed. You wouldn’t succeed. He would pull you back up and let you bounce a few times to shake the shit out of you and then set you right back on your path, a little dizzy and dazed………but HERE to hold the line with love that you signed up for. Just sayin’….none of us get off that easy right now at this critical time.
If it was that easy to bail right now, I would be standing on the bridge with you, holding your hand, and screaming GERONIMO as we fearlessly jumped together.
Yep, we are in this together. You jump, I jump. You stay, I stay. We just keep holding hands. In it together.”
Daily life, on planet earth since 2020, has been quite a ride. I am aware of the corruption and lies, keeping myself aware – but not immersed in the human scene. This helps me stand readily available to give comfort to a grieving pet owner, heal someone across the miles from accidental poisoning, and a myriad of other possible tragedies.
Those who call for assistance begin their conversations with, “I know how busy you are, Gloria, but…………….” I am busy, but never too busy to take a phone call for “a little extra love” comfort or healing. It is a part of my purpose – to be my “brother’s (sister’s) keeper,” to help them through their current “bump in the road” on this planet.
I was recently approached by the Connecting Consciousness.org group to be an Event Host in the Bitterroot’s Stevensville area. In March of 2020, I stopped watching Mainstream News completely. I looked at alternative news, filtering out the false “programming” and looking for a narrative that touched my heart/soul strings, resonating with the truth. On that path, I discovered Simon Parkes in the United Kingdom. His voice was gentle and soothing, he wasn’t into “fear porn” or being dramatic with “end of the world” scenarios. Simon became a trusted voice for me. I admired his vision and joined to be one of 200,000 members on his spiritual team.
I began going to every meeting in Montana that was offered. I chose to be actively involved and volunteered my house, time, and energy to meet people in Montana as we prepare for humanitarian projects, disclosure, and rebuilding all nations spiritually.
When I was approached to be an Event Host, which entailed providing support for local members by giving them a place to meet, a snack, updates, and being a person “with skin on” to talk to – I was absolutely thrilled to accept such a position. I have already been “doing the job” since 2020. In reality, I have been doing it all my life by “being my brother’s (sister’s) keeper.”
I will have a face-to-face interview with Simon Parkes on June 28th. The Montana Coordinators who suggested that I fill out an application for the position are absolutely convinced I am a perfect person for the job. If me being me is being the perfect person for the job, well then, I don’t have too much to worry about. Since LuAnn Stallcop “took me public” in 1995, I have been a Disclosure Rehab and Recovery Center for thousands-upon thousands of people. The Montana Coordinators have only recently met me, coming to my home to watch me in action and receiving individual healings following the meeting.
Connecting Consciousness.org is the world’s largest spiritual group and I am so proud and happy to be part of it. If you are interested in providing support in your area, it is an easy and free sign up. You will meet individuals of like mind/purpose to help this planet through the disturbing process of awakening. Each state has coordinators, providing meeting dates to join together. You will also receive support in so many ways and you will be dazzled by all the talented people you will meet.
You may have often wondered, “Where are all God’s people – those of us who volunteered to be of service at the most exciting time on Planet Earth?” People you can identify with will be coming out of the woodwork at your local meetings. They are compassionate and so gifted in every area you can imagine.
Simon Parkes and his wife, Becky, living seven hours ahead of me in London . . . probably never sat around during their life, thinking they would be the Co-Founders of such an immense vision/mission. I would certainly assume they quickly discovered a need and found a way to fill it. Together, they laid the foundation and seekers found their way to them. Selfless souls attracting selfless souls who plan to push back against the powers to contribute loving action steps towards the ascension on planet Earth. There is no “I” in team. Teamwork makes the dream work.
Simon and Becky weren’t selfishly just looking to heal their country with this organization. They had a broader vision of “being their brother’s (sister’s) keeper” and have members from all around the globe joining to counter-attack by reuniting the families and nations. (Loving thy neighbor as thy self.) Together, we produce a world worth living in.
I have heard so many people say, “I wish I knew what my purpose is.” I get it. I wondered, too, until I didn’t. I never meant to have 11 books in print, establish a prison ministry, get a Ph.D., or any of the other accomplishments. I was a “normal/common housewife/mother” when God showed up. I was busy just living my life and thinking I had a mind of my own (which is WHY I had to stop watching Mainstream News in 2020 and no longer watching cable TV “programming.”) It all changed when I gave up the mind of my own, realizing a Greater Mind was within me. By making my Direct Contact with God, He thereafter lives life through me and He reveals the spiritual nature within my consciousness, resulting as the accomplishments.
I have to admit – it has been fun being along for the ride…………… He can only work through you when you acknowledge He is within you. He cannot work through a selfish heart.
I did a Zoom Call for Montana CC members a couple weeks ago. I mentioned, “In the Bible, it says that ten righteous men can save a city.” I followed with, “A hundred Connecting Consciousness members could save the world.”
I remember back to my initial spiritual awakening days when I looked forward to making a difference in this world, doing it in a grandiose way. As those ego-traits were burned off, I remain currently with excitement to meet each new member/person in passing/or group . . . that within that opportunity, I might get to meet the One who will do just that. My ego doesn’t need o be out front on stage in a spotlight any more. I get the pleasure of just getting to be part of the process.
Your purpose? My purpose? To be our authentic selves. As we plug our 110 Volt human into 220 Volt Divine, He lives through us and fulfills Himself with Divine Intelligence and Design. I generally state, “I keep my head down, don’t be an asshole and part of the problem, chop wood, carry water, and be a part of the solution as He places people on my doorstep or telephone.” This advice keeps me from being involved with the world’s drama. Being in the world, but not part of it. Stay focused. Don’t invite other people’s drama intentionally. If God places them before you, He will give you the tools and awareness to handle it/nullify the effects.
I am my “brother’s (sister’s) keeper” and do whatever He/intuition guides me to do. Maybe that means givimg a woman refuge from domestic violence at midnight, maybe feed a group event of Connecting Consciousness members spiritual and physical food. Maybe, just maybe my purpose was to think ahead and plant a community neighborhood garden out front in plain sight along my driveway where my neighbors can get fresh food in the coming times if they can’t afford it because they had to spend their money on gas to get to work to keep a roof over their head.
No one gets to jump off a bridge while under my watch. Simon Parkes’ voice, as I said, is gentle, loving, and kind. There is NO FEAR when he speaks. I resonate with that. Fear has been a useful tool against humanity in the past (the key words here meaning IN THE PAST.) Your purpose? Just keep being the wonderful YOU, keeping your brothers and sisters calm while in the storm of their daily living and forthcoming days. Empower them with your example.
Until next month, take care . . . I care . . .
Always,
Gloria D. Benish, Ph.D.
(Alias: Dr. Glo-bug – Just here “to lighten things up”)
Greetings and good morning from the beautiful Bitterroot Valley!
My elementary home-schooled granddaughter had to write a report this week about gas and oil. She had to use them each in sentences, describing their use. She wrote, “Oil can be used to make ass fault.” I explained the correct spelling – a s p h a l t – and she responded, “I like the way I spelled it better.” So did I! She sounded it out. In this column today, I’ll “sound it out” as well . . .
Three years ago, I was babysitting my toddler grandson. He was sitting at the little-kid’s folding table and building a tower with blocks. It tipped over and he clearly said, “Dammit!” In his tiny toddler voice, I questioned if he had really said what I thought he had. Concluding that he had said a “bad” word, I corrected him. “Baby Karst, we don’t say that word, sweetheart. It’s not a nice word.” He continued playing and rebuilding the tower. It fell a second time, spilling over the sides of the table onto the floor. In frustration, he repeated, “Dammit!!” I corrected him a second time, assuring him that he shouldn’t say that word and gave him some other considerations when we get frustrated or angry.
With all the blocks now back onto the table, he re-built his little tower creation. Getting imbalanced and top-heavy, it fell now for the third time. His words followed with a tone of a toddler’s voice becoming a manly toddler voice as he barked, “Son of a bitch!” I’m sorry, but I laughed out loud!
Prior to my grandson getting this vocabulary established, my son’s kitchen flooded from the dishwasher. The flooring in that room went all the way through his house, with no ability to match the pattern any longer. I am sure – no doubts – that Karst heard daddy say a few choice words in the restoration process.
Back in the beginning of my writing career, I had been told by the publishing industry that no “bad words” can be used in an inspirational book.” It wouldn’t be allowed to sit on an inspirational book shelf in a store if it had any obscene language in it. In “Go Within or Go Without,” I had written “The Glory can go to God and the criticism can go to hell.” I truly wasn’t sure if the word “hell” would kick me off the shelf of inspiration, but there it was.
Along life’s path, God took me out of the innocent lane and had me traveling down a long dark road. He put dark subjects in front of me, which I now call “turds” and He guides me to polish them as best I can and transform them into inspirational books, speeches, or columns. It truly isn’t something I enjoy doing. Taking subjects of rape, abuse, incest, child/human trafficking, and making them palatable to the public wouldn’t be on my top ten list of favorites to write about – and yet, here I am needing to do it.
And, today’s “bad” word is narcissist. I have a Ph.D. in religious studies, but I feel like I just received my doctorate in education of this word/situation in a crash course. Man, this hasn’t been fun! But then, God ALWAYS takes a negative experience and transforms it into His Good to educate His kids. He never fails to bring us through these dark unmarked detours to get us back on the right road when we LISTEN to inner and outer guidance with warning signs.
The first time I ever heard the word “narcissist,” I was on a dinner date with my husband Kirk many years ago. The radio was on and the talk show hostess was interviewing a guidance counselor who had written a book on the subject. I only heard one line that stuck. “A narcissist always has to be right.” I looked over at Kirk and said in a question tone, “You’re a narcissist?” He said, “No.” I responded, “But, you ALWAYS have to be right and the lady just said……”
Clearly, in the vehicle, I projected the term back onto Kirk. “You always have to be right, so that makes you a narcissist.” By now, he was more-than-insulted and said, “Hon, don’t say that word, it isn’t a nice word.” For days following this radio interview, I silently thought and spelled the word narcissistic that I had just heard. It had kind of a funny ring to it and almost as many s’s as in Mississippi. My new-found fad of the word faded quickly and all these years passed and a few years ago, it started slipping into mainstream conversations. The word was identifying someone who stole the spotlight and had to be in it, always referring to how great they were. A verbalizing energy vampire who had “Hoover Vacuum” tendencies of sucking your energy dry with being around them.
Along with the recent crash course, I have been silently apologizing to my beloved husband Kirk on the other wide of the veil. “I am SO SORRY I called you such a bad word!” Kirk didn’t “have to be right,” – he most generally JUST WAS RIGHT. But he was NOT a narcissist and I don’t know if he has received my apologies at the soul level, but I am definitely so very sorry that I would label such a good man with such an ugly word and behavior.
In this 3-D reality, I don’t want to label anyone with the bad word. To “protect the guilty,” I am going to remain neutral in writing what needs to be polished for humanity’s sake of identifying and recovering from such a hideous abuse within mankind.
Describing the victim in a narcissistic relationship, (hopefully not you) is an EMPATH. An empath (who can also be a people pleaser . . . but not limited to that trait) is someone who is loving, caring, kind, over-giving and always wants to be helpful to make another person’s life easier. As an empath, we “know how other people feel” and have remarkable gifts to be of service to ease their pain. We encourage others with compliments, feeding their addiction to us. They need us, but we don’t need the grief they bring in their baggage.
Seeing the best in everyone, we ignore the red flags. In truth, if we ignore them – we will pay for them later.
Education empowers us.
As a healer, I listen for hours to other people and their pain. I’m sure you do, too! Getting a word in edge-wise is near impossible, so we patiently listen. Although it’s exhausting, we still continue to listen. When an opportunity to speak arrives, we notice that our inner knowingness and advice is not heeded, nor even heard. Body language, alone, confirms it. (Yes, we have that gift, as well. We can perceive the spoken AND unspoken languages.)
Within a narcissist’s cache of sarcasm and gas-lighting that follows an argument or their stone-walling us in silence is soon-to-be-discovered as the confirmations that helps to end the addictive relationship. You, always being the first to apologize and giving your time, energy, attention, and often-times – money – is going to be in your rearview mirror.
I am not able, in a four-page monthly column, to write all the information you will need to recover from this relationship. If guided by God to write an entire book to be of-service, I will be happy to do so.
But, for today I am just being a little farmer and planting a seed of awareness in readers. If you find yourself in a relationship with a neighbor, co-worker, partner, or family member and can identify with the small tidbits I’m offering today, I would encourage you to look deeper. There are innumerable books, I’m sure, on the topic already written by authors who have survived this horrifying experience. I am sure that on Youtube, you could look no further and get plenty of help to recover. I also list my home phone number at the end of the article if you just need someone to talk to “who knows how you feel.”
A narcissist has no desire to be healed – they don’t even see that “they” have a problem. The problem is you and they will remind you in numerable ways to confirm it. To snag you, they will wear their mask and profess to be benevolent in countless ways. They will insure you feel special to them and take every opportunity to touch upon your appearance or talent, or which they most admire.
You/me . . . being such givers of encouragement like hearing someone applaud appreciation for our kindness. We like being loved, too. But soon their lies and dangling carrots or things offered and never given start making us question our sanity.
Having been with Kirk – a man of his word, saying what he meant and meaning what he said, always backed by action steps . . . I assumed the same in this experience. Having one blow-after-another of deceit and disappointment, I re-set my yardstick and said, “I don’t eat carrots any more.”
From my current standpoint, I know there will never be closure because you are unable to do so with a narcissist. The only resolution is to walk away and don’t look back, not even into the rearview mirror of who you thought they were before their mask started to slip and fall.
Along the way in the healing process from this abusive relationship, we might find ourselves saying, “Dammit, dammit, son-of-a-bitch” or thinking, “It’s my own ass fault” for falling for the lies and abuse. I should have known better.” To all of that, I can only state that as an Empath/Healer, these gifts were given to me to know where to lay my hands, by feeling what another person is feeling and to watch miracles happen.
I will walk away a stronger person, Hercules in female form. A narcissist has strengths, too. They only choose the best. The best givers, the most loving, generous, kind empath they can find. If one found you, it is a validation of who you were meant to be on this planet to help others heal and find their way.
You already won by discovering the toxic relationship and walking quietly away. Cause no harm, but take no shit. And today’s polished turd comes to you from one who knows how you feel and knows what you have been through.
In truth, it’s no one’s ass fault, it was a learning experience – and now you (and I) have learned. We have graduated with honors. You will never win in an argument, except through the silent treatment you have learned from them. Silence, in the case with a narcissist, is golden.
As a disclaimer for this column or for me personally – I am not offering you advice of how to handle your life. I have enough to deal with in living my own . . . I wouldn’t assume I know how to live yours. But I have planted a wholesome healthy organic seed of awareness for you today for you to plant what you want in your garden to insure a healthy harvest in relationships.
In every situation in my life, I attempt to handle it in a spiritual manner. What is the most loving way for me to deal with something? The answer is for me to just continue being me. I don’t want to become hardened and stop loving humanity, nor will I. I will continue to be kind, share, help in whatever way I can . . . even if it is over-giving at times. I will be gentle, even with a narcissist because until they wake up spiritually, they can’t help being who they are from being hurt on this harsh planet.
I pray the Global 8 Prayer often: “Dearest Heavenly Father, I ask you to bless (_____) and forgive them for they know not what they do. I ask You to kiss them on the forehead (waking them up spiritually) and touch their heart with Your Divine Love (revealing Your spiritual reality and nature.) In Jesus’ name, I give my thanks. Amen.”
As humans, we look to the outer world for our abundance. We look to others “to give something to us.” In fact, Jesus pointed the way by saying the Kingdom of Heaven is within. Everything we need is within . . . waiting to open a way for it to reveal itself in the outer world.
Narcissism is a form of mental illness and no one in this world is going to effectively fix, change, or save an individual from this (or any of the conflicts we see in our world today.) The government of our lives is on God’s shoulders and as enlightened individuals, we have to go within and open a way out for His Will and governance of our lives to become realized. “Go Within or Go Without.”
Just keep being the beautiful you. Keep being loving. Keep being kind. Keep giving. Just be more conscious of who you are giving to in your personal relationships.
